Poem - Nut Case

Nut Case

Out my kitchen window, I gaze

skyward toward you, hanging idly

halfway between Earth and Heaven.

I wonder why you made the choice you did,

forsaking Mother and me, destined

to watch us through the window

outside in?

Perhaps you weren’t satisfied with her,

my quiet intense mother with demands.

Perhaps you sought mindless chatter, but

Why not simply leave us?  Ugly regimens of

pills, degrading operations never

covered by unblinking insurers.  Was freedom

so tempting?

My first day of middle school, proud in my

Tartan Gray uniform,  band concerts, Bye Bye
Birdie, conferences, all swept by without you.

Mother never tried to excuse or explain, except

when at Christmas she gave me a BB gun. 

When I asked why,

she shrugged.

So now I gaze at you, no longer here, no longer

human, just another damn squirrel

raiding our bird feeder.  Tears flood

my eyes, my face, my body.  You’ll never

drive me to my senior prom, or walk

me down the aisle.  A girl needs

fathering.

But then again, you’ll never write about

my boyfriends on your blog, like

Susie’s dad.  I lower the BB gun, open the

back door, and throw out an ear of corn.

Still, I refuse to fill the feeder one more time.

Written for One Shot Wednesday